Glimpses of Grace 23: "With all due respect--"

     This was Jerry's and my response to the unsolicited, one-sided email sent to everyone in the church to tell them not to read or send out unsolicited, one-sided emails. ;o) Although we do not identify the elders or pastors mentioned by those we quote, they pretty much all referred to Lou, Hatchet Man, and Jesus Eyes.

10-27-11
Dear Brothers on the Elder Board, 

     In your recent e-mail (Oct. 11) to all of us, you appealed for everyone to "address concerns in a Biblical and Christ-honoring manner." We heartily concur with this advice. We only wish everyone abided by it!

     Over the years God has sent scores of faithful members of our church to our leaders to show them Scripture and hold them accountable to be true to the Bible and our Statement of Faith. Those with concerns have been careful to follow Matthew 18, documenting them Biblically and taking them directly to those whose teaching has not been in accord with the Bible, rather than spreading them as gossip. As one woman put it, "I came to have concerns all on my own. . . As I have become aware that there are others with similar concerns I have observed that they too developed and examined their own concerns in their own way. . . I have heard 'I thought I was the only one' or 'We thought we were the only ones.' Thus, they did not come to their questions and quest for answers because of 'gossip' that they had heard."

     Unfortunately many of these people  (we personally know of more than a dozen) report that certain of the leaders have not received their concerns "in a Biblical and Christ-honoring manner." They typically report responses to their concerns with phrases like the following actual quotes: 
     "When I tried to bring these (concerns) to (pastor), he blasted me with anger.    When I tried to bring these to (elder) he blew me out in vicious, hateful anger on the phone. He misrepresented what we're saying. (Another elder) too accused me of saying things I've never said. Every avenue I tried to go through to speak to the leaders was squashed." (Woman)
     "You cannot talk to (pastor); he just won't listen." (Woman)

     "When I raised objections to the elders, they became almost militant about it." (Woman)

     "(Pastor) raised his voice in a threatening fashion. . . He was intensely intimidating." (Man) 
     "They wouldn't let me tell them my concerns and said I was being 'divisive.'" (More than one person)

     "Two of the elders confronted me publicly when I came to teach the women. They were standing in the doorway and told me I was not permitted to come in. They told me someone had complained about me and wouldn't tell me who it was. They did not instruct that person to bring their complaint to me directly, as Matthew 18 commands, so I could make amends. On a later occasion when I tried to protest this injustice (a third elder) screamed and yelled at me, called me a liar, falsely accused me, and demanded I sign a list of 'confessions' he had prepared, threatening to bring me before the church for 'severe church discipline' if I mentioned this to anyone." (Former head of Women's Ministries)

     "People I deeply respected had talked to (pastor). Very capable people have questioned him and got no place. I almost gagged at the way (elder) has treated several people. So unkind and abrupt. He needs to repent and go ask forgiveness of the people he's offended. I don't see repentant hearts among the elders." (Man)

     "I felt totally intimidated. They scared me. I was shaking." (Woman)

     "I lost it. I was bawling." (Woman)

     And always, "They told me not to talk about it."

     This lying and intimidation has apparently been a pattern among some of the leadership of this church for years:

     One elder left the elder board when he was instructed to tell people that a decision had been "unanimous." "I told them that was a lie and I would not lie for them," he said.

     One of three staff members forced out of GBC all at the same time said, "They made me leave the church without telling me why. They even wrote up a list of 'confessions' and signed my name to them to present to the church body. If (one of the other two) hadn't threatened to speak up and say it was a lie if they read the 'confession' publicly, they would have gone through with it."

     Another man on staff briefly said, "In the service the leaders told the congregation I was leaving the church to take a job in the private sector. When I got out in the parking lot afterwards I broke down in tears. It was all lies. They told me to leave without telling me why. I didn't have another job."

     Because most of these people did not talk about their experience and subsequently left our church, it was only recently they discovered that almost all of them share the experience of having approached certain elders with truth and having had their concerns dismissed out of hand. They were blamed, shamed, threatened, intimidated, or in other ways verbally abused.

     Others whom we know, still in our church, are currently experiencing this. The two of us personally experienced what felt intimidating by an elder when we attempted to send out e-mails to some of you asking prayer for our church in our capacity as Prayer Coordinators. On two different occasions this elder called and kept demanding to know why we were asking for prayer for our church, who we were sending our letters to and what we were going to be praying. When I (Jessica) asked whether it was all right to pray for a certain meeting which I had not realized was confidential he said, "WE'RE praying!" in such a tone that it was clear the answer was no. When I told him I was feeling attacked and badgered--by this time I was shaking and in tears--he said, "I'm not badgering you!" and kept on making the same demands, even ordering us not to send out letters asking for prayer without his permission!

     We want to hasten to add that this kind of treatment has not been our experience or that of others from the majority of our leaders. But it has been the experience of a significant number of people from the same handful of pastors and elders.

     We have been told by other elders that the elders in question "are human" and "under stress." But that does not excuse sinful behavior on their part any more than it would excuse such behavior in any of us. We're all human and often under stress but anyone who responds in this kind of brutalizing manner to people of sincerity are responsible to confess their anger to God and to ask forgiveness from those they have abused.

Sincerely,

Jerry and Jessica Renshaw

P.S. No one has been blind-copied in this e-mail.

Glimpses of Grace 22: The e-mail to end all e-mails

     The Board of Elders took decisive, if passive-aggressive, action against those exposing them. Almost every service opened with a different elder reading some prepared statement or prayer misquoting Bible verses to declare things like "the elders are worthy of double honor" and declaring their "unanimous" support of Lou. (We know they aren't unanimous; at least three of them stand with us in opposing his doctrine and the personality cult surrounding him.) 
    Lou had finished his series on the fruit of the spirit, or rather, he had declared himself bored with the series and said he wanted to switch to something else. I noticed the fruits he had decided not to preach on, ironically, were "gentleness" and "self-control." Now in his sermons, Lou would manage to get a dig in at those sending out emails even if it had to come from a verse in I Corinthians during his new series on Exodus.
     In the Life Groups, held in private homes, they warned against reading unsolicited e-mails. They mentioned the "Renshaw issue" by name and told people not to speak to us or read what we write. (Of course we try not to send anything to anyone who doesn't want it.)
     The day after a group of intercessors agreed God was "changing the angelic guard" and giving us "a higher level of authority for a higher level of warfare, a friend in Oregon texted us, "Stand firm. The enemy has not retreated. He is just gathering more workers." That was at 7:48 on the morning of October 11. 
     At 4:01 that afternoon, we received an email, Important Communication from the Leadership of Grace, sent to everyone in our church of 800 who has email. It referred to "unsolicited emails containing charges, accusations, inferences and innuendo against the pastoral staff and elders of the church" with an "appeal to the people involved to address concerns in a Biblical and Christ-honoring manner." They called themselves "men of God" and defended their commitment to "personally living and leading God's church under the authority of God's Word." 
     They certainly were "gathering more workers."
     It was signed by the head of the Executive Board of Elders, the one I have chosen to call Hatchet Man. It sounded so sane and reasonable even we could almost be persuaded they were the victims.

Glimpses of Grace 21: In His hands

     The following Sunday morning while we were singing in the main service, I asked God again to search my heart and reveal whether we are the ones believing lies or if I have sinned against anyone in anything I have said or written about the leaders of this church. I told him it does not matter what happens to me.      
     If I am wrong, I told him, if I have hurt any innocent person, do to me whatever You will--like King David when God offered him three disciplinary options, "Let me fall into the hands of the LORD, for his mercy is great; but do not let me fall into the hands of men!"
     I told God whatever punishment I deserve if I am the one deceived is deserved--shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?--"but Lord, You and Your reputation are what matters. You are good, kind, all-loving, all-righteous, Almighty, all knowing, everywhere present. There is none like You! All I care about is that You be glorified. Even if we are right, it does not matter what happens to me, they cannot separate me from You, they cannot destroy my soul. At 'worst,' I will just go be with You forever. That is a good thing."

     As I prayed, I felt slight but definite pressure in the centers of the palms of my hands. I looked at them and could not see anything. But God spoke to my spirit and said, The nails which went through My hands are going through yours, too. I was persecuted and you are being persecuted with Me. We are being nailed to the cross together. I am with you. 
      Wow. 

Glimpses of Grace 20: "You're hearing voices"

     On October 9, we emailed the denunciation I believe God directed me to write to each of the elders, none of whom ever acknowledged it. But some of their wives still acknowledge it by their body language. The senior's pastor's wife maintains a profile chiseled in stone, never glancing in my direction. Another, a greeter at the door to the social hall where we are holding services during the remodeling of the sanctuary, hands my husband a bulletin and immediately lifts her chin and turns her head as if to greet someone behind her, although there is nothing there but a wall. 
     There is one elder I will call Healer. His wife is the one who prayed for me so tenderly in Agape, the same woman who told WOW "I love you but I can't speak with you." I will call her Hospitality. Someone forwarded to us an email from her in which she testified beautifully to her faith in Christ alone and called Healer "my dear husband--who is the kindest man I know."

     ". . . There may be personality conflicts in our body, but I do not believe the pastor and our men are trying to "take over" and deceive us. I will continue to love my Savior here. We had the honor of leading a lady to Christ 2 Sundays ago. She heard our pastor and said that it was several things that he said that made a difference for her.

     "If someone said there is some other way to secure salvation other than through the blood of Christ, then I would fight. Until then, I will 'commit myself unto the one who judges justly'.

     She also (briefly) blasted me: "By the way, there is someone different to call on the prayer requests because the previous person said she is getting counseling and "other things" which she stated herself in a class. This person also called out a name and condemned someone (publicly) who was not even there to defend themselves.  She has sent letters as if she is God speaking. I am sorry, but I would never write a letter as if I am the voice of God. How dare I?!

     "This is not godly, it is unstable. .  ."

     She signed herself, "Safely and securely in the Arms of Jesus"

     "Jerry," I said after reading this, "I didn't mention JE's name, did I? I'm sure I didn't!"
     "You mentioned Hatchet Man by name."
     "I did? I didn't mean to."
     "At the end. You got a little emotional."
     "That's right. I did. I'm sorry."
       
     After the "Letter from God," Mrs. Music Man continued to greet and be kind to me in choir but she was struggling to understand. After choir rehearsal the first night after I sent God's response to the elders she, Jerry and I stood out in the chilly night and talked. She asked how I could "write as if I were God" and she listened as I tried to explain why I believe God wrote the letter through me. When I finished she referred gently to my "hearing voices" and said I was hurting people.
     I can certainly appreciate how these people could see it that way. In their shoes, I am sure I would too.  

Glimpses of Grace 19: Changing of the Angelic Guard

     Three friends in the church wrote us separately, tentatively, urging us to obey our elders. With Jerry's approval, I wrote to each of them:

     "What you tell us corresponds with what I want to hear, as much as from (on my part) sheer intimidation and a desire to lie low and not draw fire as from wanting to do everything 'decently and in order,' according to I Corinthians 14:40.

     "In myself I am terrified of these people and when friends urge us to go slowly, hear both sides, etc., I want to do exactly that, be sensible and conciliatory. But I have not had any peace about this. God has been waking me in the night and calming my fear about these powerful people, replacing it with a profound peace in my soul. But with the peace comes a certain knowledge that He wants to use us to expose corruption deeper than anything anyone has sensed or to this point brought before the leaders of our church. He keeps impressing on my spirit, Bring the deeds of darkness into the light of My judgment. 

     "Jerry and I have spent hours in prayer, Bible study, and singing before Him as He leads us to keep our focus on Him. At the same time whenever I go before the Lord He has been communicating His anger and passion at abuses in the church as He must have done to the prophets. And He has been showing us what He wants us to do. I tremble before Him but I cannot disobey.

     "I have struggled with the Lord about this: I'm sure they're good men. They mean well. Most of them are probably just deceived. Who am I to pronounce these outrageous judgments on them? We must remain under their authority! Lord, You know that! They have told us to be quiet. How can I confront them or continue to expose them to others?

     "Yesterday it came to a head. I told the Lord, 'You know I will do ANYTHING You tell me too. I will face anything, risk anything, lose anything, including every physical possession, every relationship, my reputation, my life for You! BUT I HAVE TO KNOW BEYOND THE SHADOW OF A DOUBT THAT THIS IS FROM YOU! Jerry may back me just because he loves me and even though we run everything we write through a mature, godly friend also, he could be mistaken, too. I NEED THREE INDEPENDENT WITNESSES THAT THIS IS OF YOU!'

     "As I was praying this, the phone rang. A friend wanted to tell me that three of our mutual friends were at her house and she wanted to pass the phone around and have us say hi to each other. I said, 'Oh, G., I'm sorry but I'm not up to chit-chat right now! I am going through a really rough time!' G. said immediately, 'We'll pray for you right now!" 

     "None of these people attend our church. Of the four, only G. knew anything of what we have been facing. She has prayed with me for this church over the years and sensed darkness and mocking spirits here. G. put her phone in speaker mode and they all took turns praying for us. This is what they prayed (and shared with us as they prayed). Let me point out that 'words of knowledge' and 'words of wisdom' are two legitimate  spiritual gifts listed in I Corinthians 12:8, 8-10; and 14:6, as long as we 'test the spirits' against the word and character of God before we receive them.

     "'Lord: bind, gag, and blindfold every demon linked to the strongman over that church. Give peace. May the elders and leaders come up as pure gold. I've seen justice in Jerry's and Jessica's hearts. It burns inside them. Cover them with Your blood and with Your angels.

     "'I'm seeing a picture of an army of angels--two rows of them like cavalry--marching toward you two. There will be a 'changing of the guard.' There is an angel standing behind each one of you, guarding you. New angels are coming in to replace the old angels, bigger angels because you have been called into a higher level of warfare. You are peacemakers. You now have a higher level of authority so God has done a 'changing of the guard.'

     "'(Missed some words as I was taking notes as fast as I could) --bless you. In God's hand no one can touch you. Lord, give them the peace that passes all understanding. The surface waters and waves may be churning and crashing about but the ocean depths are calm. Rely and rest on, trust the Word of God. You are in His hands.

     "'Seal this with Your signet ring, O Lord!"

     "Another said, 'You and Jerry are gatekeepers. You cannot allow (missed something here) to come in. Whatever God is telling you to say or do--do it! You have His authority. Don't hold back!' Everyone there confirmed these words and visions.

     "This stunned me. I had asked for three independent confirmations that what we are hearing is of God--and while I was praying for three, He gave us four! 

     "Now I was fully convinced that God is the one calling me to write these appalling things, things I can scarcely believe myself. But I still felt I had to question Him about His timing. I couldn't get past the hierarchy of authority in Matthew 18. We had taken our grievance directly to the elder who had told us in effect (twice, at that point), 'You can't pray!' with no response to our grievance other than an increase in what I felt was his "badgering" us. Then I had appealed by e-mail to several elders, including the senior pastor, the pastor (JE) who had scared me, and executive elders whom I knew were involved in the commands to silence of many of our people. The subject heading of my e-mail was 'please stop.' There was no acknowledgement of this letter, no response--but then, I was so intimidated (and the younger parts of me so traumatized) by what the elders were saying to us, my letter was nearly incoherent. I'm sure they didn't read past the first two paragraphs. 

     "I prayed, Lord, I am willing to write whatever you want me to write, but first shouldn't I write to the elders and tell them we have read their letter, prayed about it, obeyed their request--asking God to show us if we have sinned, confessing the sins He revealed (which we have done)? Shouldn't I tell them we will submit to their authority except where it conflicts with Your authority? Shouldn't we let our correspondents know we have done all that, for the sake of our credibility?

     "Then God spoke to my heart and said, 'What I want you to tell the elders is not your message. It is not about you. I want you to give them MY message--AND I AM NOT UNDER THEIR AUTHORITY!'

     "Only then did I have His peace again.

     "I believe the Lord has a letter He wants us to write them. I must obey the Sovereign Lord. How can I not?

     "Please keep praying for truth to replace the lies in our church. I have prayed this for myself every day for years: 'Lord, speak truth to the lies I believe.'  It is amazing what God has showed me about myself--who I really am as opposed to who I think I am--and about Him.

Blessings,

(Jerry and) Jessica  

Glimpses of Grace 18: Music Man

     One of the elders asked if he could come talk with us. Not any elder but one of the nine executive elders at the inner core--and a personal friend of ours. Music Man is a man of integrity and Christ-like character whom we have always liked and admired. He said he knew we had questions and concerns about the events at church and he wanted to listen to our viewpoint.

     We were grateful but guarded. On Saturday, October 1, we welcomed him into our home with mutual hugs. He immediately noticed our piano and after asking permission, sat down and played for us one of eight worshipful arrangements of Christmas carols he had just written. It was such a sweet start to the time. Then Jerry opened in prayer and asked if we could tape our conversation so none of us would be misquoted. Music Man said he was fine with that.

     We shared everything candidly, especially the verbal abuse WOW and others of our friends have been experiencing at the hands of some of the elders which has caused them to leave our church. I shared how I had felt "badgered" by JE.

     Music Man was earnest and seemed sympathetic to our concerns. He assured us he loves the Lord and still believes all the truths of Scripture. But he is convinced the senior pastor and executive elders also believe and still teach those truths. And he is buying into the deception that leadership needs to "circle the wagons" (his term) and keep control for the sake of unity "until things settle down." 

      We listened to him and he listened to us for 90 minutes--and I, at least, really felt heard. He said he would go back and encourage the board to be more open and discuss the issues people are raising about their beliefs and teaching.  

     A couple of times toward the end of our conversation, however, he said something odd. "If I should do or say something in the next few days or weeks that seems--seems--to be contrary to what I am saying now, please give me grace."  He said it again after he prayed as we closed. Earnestly, apologetically: "Please extend grace to me. You will find me in situations in the weeks ahead not trying to silence people, please, just simply to say, 'Let's stop,' 'let's find ways (to keep things from escalating). . . a chance for dialogue.'"

     We were to recall those words the very next day. Music Man came to our Agape class with two other elders to denounce those who send out "trails of blind-copied emails--" "inflammatory emails"--"with accusations against elders in our church."

     Jerry and I weren't in class that morning but we asked the elder who read the announcement to email us a copy, which he did. When I read it, I was aghast.

     Lord, what have we done? How could we have done this to these sincere, honest men?

     In my spirit the Lord's small, still voice said, Read it again. 

     I remembered King Hezekiah's response to the threatening message from his enemies, mocking his trust in God. Hezekiah "took the letter from the hand of the messengers and read it, and he went up to the house of the LORD and spread it out before the LORD. . ."
     "Jerry," I said, "we need to read this again." We got on our knees beside our bed and spread the elders' letter out before the Lord. We read it aloud, slowly, one sentence at a time. And the facade of righteous indignation in it crumbled. Every claim in it was a lie!
     "This is plain and simple gossip--" No, legitimate concerns! ". . . contain innuendo and inference--" No, facts! "--that is causing fear, distrust, emotional damage, fractured relationships--" No, they are exposing the lies that have caused fear, distrust, emotional damage, fractured relationships!-- "they are hurting real people and causing real damage to our church." Yes, you are!   

Glimpses of Grace 17: (S)mashed potatoes

     I don't mean to sound cocky. I'm acutely aware that if Satan is small potatoes in relation to the Almighty, we are (s)mashed potatoes in relation to Satan, at least in our own strength. One man cautioned Jerry and me not to do anything alone. I have to stay under my husband's authority as my covering, not do anything he doesn't agree is of God, and he has to stay under the authority of Jesus Christ.

      In early October, after sending out the email to our general mailing list, posted here as "The battle is joined" (Glimpses 13 and 14), various intercessors sensed in their spirits that God is saying the battle is HIS, reminding us that He is the Captain of the Army of Israel, King of Kings and Lord of Lords, that He will fight for us. 

    One told us to "ask God to render all war room plans against you and Jerry null and void. That the Light convict and disarm all known and unknown strategies of the enemy at work in this situation. That Jesus Messiah would turn the heart of this servant [Lou] to the Most High God once and for all. That he would come to his senses and the spell be broken under the blood of Jesus Christ."

     Intercessors have gotten words and thoughts like, "You are standing on the wall" or "filling in the gap." "He's proud of you!" He is telling us to "stand firm," "fear not," "be strong." Independently, many intercessors have sensed God saying this is HIS church and He wants it back! He is calling us to "protect the cornerstone" or "foundation" in prayer and as we do, He will protect us. One prophetic word to us was "They can't hurt you!"

     Of course these are human beings claiming they are hearing from God or seeing in the Spirit so their words must be tested. What they say must be consistent with the teachings of Scripture and even if it is, we need to double-check: "Heavenly Father, is this for us? for now?"

      One pastor of our church confided that the leadership refers to the handful of us who are starting to openly question their teachings and agenda as "deadwood," which they have vowed to cull out. But God calls us "the faithful remnant." And the "handful" is growing. In early October a friend in Oregon texted me that 20 people up there are praying for us! The director of the prayer ministry Jerry and I minister with in the mountains sent out a prayer alert to all his intercessors (about 30 people).

     We have felt great peace and gratitude, for the most part. The two of us take consolation in the fact that NOBODY can prevent us from praying! One day a friend wrote, "I am sensing that you and Jerry, more so Jerry as He is the spiritual head of the home, begin to pray scripture out loud for 2 hours tonight. Start by asking the Holy Spirit to give you the verses of scripture needed here, and rest yourselves as you need it. Wait on Him as He leads you.  

     "What is resonating to me is as the Jews prayed for Esther and sought God through their submission and faith and prayers, He delivered Esther and the nation of Israel. You are a symbolic Israel. Again, please weigh and check for confirmation from Him in both of your spirits here. I trust the strength of the Lord on your behalf." 

    Those two hours, which we had thought we could never fill, were wonderful. The Lord brought back to mind one relevant verse after another and we declared them aloud together. Then we meditated on the names of God. We sang hymns that described Jehovah and His victorious power. We blessed and prayed for each of the elders and pastors.

     Physical oppression by the enemy sometimes wakes me at night but God has me use that time to pray or review Bible verse. I like to go over Psalm 23--in Spanish, which I am trying to learn. I don't know why it is more comforting to me in Spanish. Or He gives me understanding of what is going on in the war room. I'm no Elisha but at times it reminds me of the passage in 2 Kings 6, where God kept the prophet Elisha aware of what the king of Aram was plotting against the king of Israel: "Elisha, the prophet who is in Israel, tells the king of Israel the very words you [King of Aram] speak in your bedroom.”

     In obedience to what we believe God told us through one intercessor, we prayer-and-praise-walked around our classroom the night before the elders sat in on our class and the next morning the room was filled with the love and fellowship of the Lord! We also walked around the building in which the elders meet and the next meeting, the "inquisition" of our teacher, was civil. There were no bad repercussions from it.

     Then we prayer-walked all three pieces of property Grace owns and pounded symbolic tent pegs into every corner of each property, claiming it for the Lord Jesus Christ and announcing "We worship Yahweh, the Sovereign God of the Universe!"

   

Glimpses of Grace 16: Behind the men

     I don't want to give you the impression that the spiritual attacks Jerry and I and other intercessors have been under are always trivial. Remember the eye of Sauron in The Lord of the Rings? On the Sunday I fell apart (GOG 12), I saw in my spirit a beam of light, an "all-seeing eye" of evil, swing around to fix me with its awareness. I felt caught, exposed, helpless, and at the mercy of an unseen force like the one by which Gandolf was hurled across the room and smashed against a wall by a gesture. It made me want to run from the church and never come back. I was literally incoherent with terror. 

     Yet two days later, as you know from the letter I wrote that day (September 27), God had so calmed and energized us that we knew without a doubt He is about to do a mighty work in our church and that it is a privilege to play a part in it! He may have led other members of our church to leave but He is calling us to stay and to stand for truth. In Christ, we are armed and dangerous. 
     We don't want to focus on the enemy because he is pretty small potatoes next to the Almighty and, like any other bully, he takes all attention as a compliment. But you do have to be aware and diligent and know how to fight him. 
      Jerry and I have had a lot of experience with spiritual warfare. As a couple, we have been involved in a ministry of inner healing and spiritual warfare since we married--and I myself since the late 90s, when I was taken through deliverance by an American Baptist pastor Paul Cox of Aslan's Place and added to an intercessory team with him and his successors at the Center for Prayer Mobilization in Idyllwild, California. We have led or been part of prayer teams throughout more than 40 ministry weekends. I have also been trained in spiritual warfare and other forms of prayer under Dr. Neil Anderson, Dr. Charles Kraft, Dr. Ed Smith, and Dr. Tom Hawkins.

     We know we have an enemy and we know our enemy is not flesh and blood but "(evil) rulers (principalities, cosmic powers) of the unseen world, powers (mighty satanic beings), world forces (authorities, potentates, great evil princes) of this present darkness, spiritual (superhuman) spirits of wickedness," according to Ephesians, chapter 6, verse 12. 

     Some of the evil forces we have dealt with can be intimidating but they must yield to the delegated authority of Jesus Christ in us. In His name, we have learned to break curses, cancel any "legal" rights the enemy claims to keep people captive in lies, sickness, emotional torment, addiction, or sin, and break their power over individuals.

     In each situation, the Holy Spirit gives prayer team members whatever spiritual gifts they need to know what must be done and how to do it. Despite all our training, we come to each situation with "an empty tool box" and ask Him to fill it with the insight or other tools we need. Often we only get that insight in part and those tools one at a time as we listen to the person we are praying for and to the Lord, following what usually seem gentle nudges as we go along. It is only looking back, after the Lord has delivered someone from  demonic oppression, that we can see how the Lord was leading all the way.

     The ministry has many intercessors, three or more of whom can be gathered at any time of crisis. They are from many different denominations and backgrounds. Many have been through deliverances or healing themselves. They each have different spiritual gifts and when we gather the Lord generally assembles a gift mix that is just right for the need at hand.  
     I have always been thankful I don't have the gift of seeing demons. Friends of ours who do find it unnerving. It's always easier to face these ugly brutes and command them to leave in the name of Jesus if you can't actually see them. 
     The Bible says in Hebrews 5:14 that as we mature in Christ and exercise our spiritual capacities, "our senses will be trained to discern good and evil." I used to have zero capacity to know what was going on in the spiritual realm. Now I get mental pictures or words of knowledge when God wants me to have them for the purpose of ministering healing to someone.
     Since God revealed we are in this battle for our--His--church--I've been getting all kinds of discernment--and so have others as they pray for us.   

Glimpses of Grace 15: Just in case. . .

     Why do we think what is happening in our church has anything to do with hoods, curses, and demons? Well, for one thing, we sense them. A couple of hours after I send out an email or post something liable to upset the elder board, I can feel the electrical tingling all over me that I only feel in the presence of witchcraft. Or I feel the anger of those reading them as a knot in my stomach or a noose tightening around my neck or "see" in a distance a mob of angry people shouting (inaudibly) "Crucify Him!"

    When our intercessors pray for our church, they tell us they sense the same things: "I get the word 'cult." "There is a new light growing but it needs to be put out." "There is a kingdom but it is a false kingdom." A 72-year old woman in Massachusetts wrote us, "I prayed for you and your church a lot last night around midnight. The ones causing trouble may experience some severe penalties. Ananias and Sapphira types come to my mind." 

     A local woman praying for our senior pastor told me over the phone, "I see this man getting on his knees like a little boy, crying. The Lord is going to humble him. It will loosen the chains that are around the church, major bondage. They have no idea what they're dealing with. the enemy is right in front of their face. They'll find out. God will allow it to be exposed. He will work it out." 

     One young woman with powerful discernment who knows nothing about Freemasonry told me, "I see men with black hoods over their heads and faces laying you on a pentagram on the floor and praying against you."   

     When the man I am going to call Bear received a letter from the elders declaring that they were going to publicly denounce him before the whole congregation on a certain date for "the sin of stirring up dissension" (by exposing them), someone saw a man sticking pins into a pin cushion. When we asked God what this meant, we sensed the letter was a Trojan horse and the statements in it were curses. They were intended to prick and burn him and the rest of us if we kept taking them out and handling them. 

      When we pray for God to cover the eyes and block the ears of the enemy, scramble the enemy's communications systems, fall into the pits they dig for us, miss when they shoot at us, turn their anger on each other, get times and places wrong, it works for awhile but we have to keep doing it. The evil keeps getting re-empowered. The ley lines of access to us re-connect and have to be dealt with again. In our experience this only happens in high level warfare.

     And we know it because of the retaliation against our computer, by which we are disseminating truth they don't want known. The severe "password-stealing" virus that tried to invade when we refused to tell the elders the names of those we had blind-copied was just the beginning.

        As soon as I started Glimpses of Grace, the attacks against emails switched to attacks on my blog.  First I couldn't get to it. I'd get the message "Page you're looking for cannot be found." We laid hands on my computer and by the authority of Jesus Christ commanded the enemy to get off it. That worked.

     Then I got the message "Your request cannot be understood." In Jesus' name we commanded the enemy to release all our communications. The Lord showed Jerry how to fix it by simply re-booting each time. As long as I went directly to the blog, we had no problem.

     Once I could access it again, the cursor locked up and wouldn't move.

     After the Lord fixed that, the cursor went crazy. When my hand was on the mouse but not moving it, the cursor raced erratically around the page all by itself (as I'm told ouija board "cursors" do). 

     When that was resolved, the type style, color, and font starting switching back and forth randomly (they still do) and a young man sensed a "spirit of harassment." Then I started hearing from people who had been reading the blog that they couldn't get to it. They were being re-routed to sites that said things like, "You've WON!"

     I finally decided to stay online and signed in around the clock--and my computer shut itself off. Coincidences?

     Actually I take it as a neat reminder that the enemy is no match for the Most High God. I can almost see the men in the war room, getting more and more frustrated as they try to stop God's exposure of them every way they know how. I don't want to believe that our elders themselves are using curses, incantations, and voodoo against us but whatever spiritual entities are behind them certainly seem to be. 

     So in case you can't get to this blog or suddenly there are no new posts appearing on it, you'll know why.

Glimpses of Grace 14: The battle is joined, part 2

    Here are specific things to pray for. Be sure you pray in Jesus' name and by His authority. (Some of these are in the physical realm but much of it is in the spiritual realm.)

--that we will have wisdom to know what and whom to believe, discernment as to who is genuinely of the one true God and whom to trust. For unity in the body of Christ. That those who are deceived will be delivered from deception and mind control, restored to their right minds, and will repent of their involvement in evil.

--that God will expose what needs to be exposed and judge what needs to be judged.

--that black hoods will not hide identities or agendas. That pentagrams used against this church and God's people here will be utterly destroyed and all curses made using the pentagram will be of no effect. That the Lord will remove all ungodly rings, aprons, nooses, tools, treasure chests, jewels, partitions, brands, seals, ropes, chains, wires, cords,  threads, programs, webbing, tunnels, etc. 

--that any ungodly stones, insignia, documents, books, etc. laid in the new foundation of our church will be exposed and removed, that all ungodly dedications of Grace Brethren Church to a new, ungodly foundation will fail and be powerless. That any and all false/mocking gods, trinities, baptisms, communions, crucifixions, etc. done on our church property or on behalf of anyone in our church will be rendered null and void.

--that any and all curses, ungodly oaths, vows, incantations, covenants, promises, etc., spoken against Grace Brethren Church or any of its members that are "undeserved" or "without cause" will not "land" ("alight" or "come to rest," Proverbs 26:2), but be rendered powerless. That missiles of confusion, fear, chaos, division, destruction, etc. which the enemy is hurling at God's people will be turned back against him. That the agenda of the enemy will not come to pass but God's will alone be done and that God will be exalted and glorified through His victory over these forces of darkness. 
--That all evil, unclean and mocking spirits will leave all the property of Grace Brethren Church (including the property on Atlantic Avenue and on the south side of 36th Street) immediately and together, never to return or send replacements. That there will be NO retaliation by the enemy against anyone for these prayers or for action God leads us to take in response to our prayers. That God will protect our health, safety, minds, marriages, families, property, belongings (including cars and pets!) and reputations.
--That God will remove, cleanse, burn up, and utterly destroy any and all defilement and corruption left by evil and unclean spirits on this church property and restore holiness. That He will heal and comfort those who have been wounded, threatened, mocked, and intimidated by the enemy through the words and actions of these people.

--That the communication and transportation systems (ley lines) of the enemy will be scrambled, burned up, and destroyed. That what God is doing--when, where, how, through whom--will be under the enemy's radar and that the weapons of the enemy will go astray and be rendered harmless. That the enemy will be blindsided, not us.

--That we will overcome evil with good by blessing those who curse us, forgiving and praying for them (Matthew 5:44). 

Our Father, the one we worship and praise, is Jehovah, the almighty God of the universe. We believe this God has told us, "You are the remnant. Be strong. Don't be afraid. Stand and I will take care of the rest!" He is with us (including you), in us, around us, overarching us, upholding us. His warrior angels are doing battle for us. I, Jessica, saw (in my spirit) God's light start to shine. There were rats running from it. The rats were in darkness and the darkness went with them. Another intercessor saw God "bringing His forces on huge beautiful white horses!" 

"God chooses things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And He chooses things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful." (I Corinthians 1:27)

     Come have your way with us, Lord Jesus!

Love,

Jerry and Jessica Renshaw

Prayer Coordinators,

Grace Brethren Church of Long Beach, California

Glimpses of Grace 13: The battle is joined, part 1

September 27, 2011

Dear Friends at Grace,

     We have bad news about our church and some very good news: A spiritual battle is underway for the control of Grace Brethren Church. That's the bad news. The very good news is, God wins!

Your assignment should you choose to accept it is to join God's side. We will give you suggestions below as to how to do that.

     God has been revealing to His servants at Grace and to those with spiritual discernment at a number of other churches: There are people IN our church praying AGAINST our church. Some of these people have infiltrated our leadership. I personally sense in my spirit that at least two of them have been assigned and sent to our church for the specific purpose of destroying it from within. The enemy has used these people to sow fear, confusion, and chaos among us. Through secrecy, deception, threats, and commands to silence he has forced out of our church some of our most faithful and godly teachers and members. Our current rebuilding program has given these enemies of God an opportunity to attempt to establish our church on a new foundation--theirs. 

We believe God is reminding those who have ears to hear that this is HIS church and He wants it back! He is re-claiming it, returning it to its original foundation, that is, Jesus Christ (I Cor. 3:11) and His written Word: "the Bible, the whole Bible, and nothing but the Bible." (Psalm 38:2)

     God is light, truth, and love. What the enemy does in the dark, God wants brought into the light for judgment. Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy and he is the father of lies. God comes to give Himself through the blood of His son to bring abundant life, truth, true flourishing, wisdom, power, peace, freedom, and joy. (John 10:10) He is amply able and strongly desiring to protect us in this battle. Put and keep on the full armor of God! (Eph. 6:10-18)

     Our enemy is not flesh and blood. We are not fighting against human beings. But we are resisting the enemy who is deceiving and using them--and he will run from us! (James 4:7) The powers of darkness tremble in fear of us because our Daddy is bigger than their daddy! (I John 4:4)

     Jesus Christ has all authority in heaven and on earth. (Matthew 28:18) That leaves NONE for anyone else! He has delegated that authority to those in whom He dwells--you and me. He has said we will not only do the same works He did on earth but "even greater works" as the Holy Spirit continues to carry out God's purposes in the world through us. (John 14:12)

     Should we choose to join God's people in this battle, we must first and continually humble ourselves before God, submitting our minds, souls, spirits, bodies, emotions, and will, plus our assumptions, fears, agendas, etc. (as He brings them to your mind) to Him alone. Ask Him to reveal any wicked way in you (Psalm 139:23-24), then confess and repent of anything He shows you, so that there will be no entry point in any of us for the enemy to use as a foothold, nothing to which he can attach, no grounds for any accusation against us. Jesus Christ said the enemy "has nothing in [no hold/claim on, no power over] Me." (John 14:30) We need to be "squeaky-clean" like He is in order to be invulnerable to the enemy.

     Stay on your knees, keep your shield up and wield your sword as you walk in the garden with Him and experience His rest and peace. We can do all of these things at once! He'll show us how to fight by praying from a place of peace.  

Glimpses of Grace 12: Coincidence?

     As I went to bed that Thursday night I thought, Our freedom to send out e-mails communicating truth and blessing to each other must be a huge threat to those who hate us. At least they have no control over that! When I turned on my computer Friday morning, our virus protection program warned us of a "severe" threat: a virus which "steals passwords" was actively trying to take over. I couldn't help wondering if those praying against the exposure of truth were hacking into my computer and trying to shut us down. Our security program was able to block it.
     Faithful's appearance before the Board of Executive Elders the same night JE called was civil, possibly because we knew about it, so we were able to pray for it and so several lay people could attend to be sure it remained civil. Faithful was given time to respond to questions and time to give his own statement at the end. Then the executive elders went into closed session. We waited for their verdict and heard nothing.

     The Sunday before Faithful met with the Board, they had told him that two elders would be sitting in on his class. Prepared and pre-prayed, the dozen or so members of Agape received the two elders with a genuinely warm welcome. Both were old friends of most of us and Faithful introduced them, adding that one of them had helped found the class years before.

    I'm not sure what they expected to hear--plots against them, perhaps--but Faithful just continued teaching the book of Revelation. (Interestingly, two other elders sympathetic to us, also attended--and, by choice, have attended ever since.)  
     So now, the Sunday after Faithful's interrogation, when we had not heard whether he would be allowed to continue teaching or not, we gathered as usual and the same two elders--this time without advance notice--showed up again.
     One of them was JE. I was sitting in the back row before we started and at his voice I glanced around and saw him standing a few feet from me, a styrofoam cup of coffee in his hand. Our eyes met. I think he may have said "Good morning" to me, I don't know. I freaked out.
     I started shaking so violently Jerry had to hurry over, sit beside me and keep his arm tight around me so I wouldn't fall off the chair. I kept glancing at JE, who had taken a seat closer to the front of the class, on the other side of the small room. I was clutching myself together and my teeth were chattering as if the temperature had fallen 50 degrees. Only another victim will understand why my reaction was so extreme.

     Within me, the younger parts were in crisis, all over the place, looking for cover yet determined to speak aloud. I prayed hard, "Lord, help! I can't tell them I am broken! They will think I am crazy! But I don't want to leave. This is my class and it has always been a safe place. I need prayer. Please help me be able to ask for prayer without identifying the person whose presence is terrifying me!"

     After a few opening comments which seemed to take forever, Faithful asked if there were any prayer requests. I raised a trembling hand and gasped out something about having been split in childhood by abuse and feeling re-traumatized by the persistent calls of someone in the room. I said I had just started seeing a counselor who specializes in this kind of brokenness.

     Several people prayed aloud for me as I kept shaking. One of them--the first one to pray, bless her heart--was the wife of the other elder assigned to sit in on our class. She had come with him and she prayed such a sweet prayer for comfort for me. 

     I was so grateful that when I got home I e-mailed her to thank her.